Lessons of Pain

Philippians 2:7

Instead, he gave up his divine privileges
he took the humble position of a slave
and was born as a human being.
When he appeared in human form. (NLT)

Why me? I used to question a lot in my life. I planned for a “easy” life. Where I got what I prayed for and no losses would come my way. Yes, I grew as a believer in Christ, although, I didn’t have my own relationship with Him. I thought maybe I could ride my relative’s relationship with God. He was busy anyway so he wouldn’t miss out on me, right? Sooooo wrong?! I learned the hard way.

Reading and studying open my eyes to many parallels of God. I felt conviction for my younger hopes in life. Jesus left his amazing kingdom to suffer on behave of me. On an earth he would experience loneliness, betrayal and shame (just to name a few). The love he showed, allowed me to reflect on my own life. The times when my temper tantrums fail silent to God.

This would propel me to seek Him deeper. My trials weren’t simply for me. Just like Jesus made sure to experience each human feeling. When the storms are beating me down, I could come back to his own journey. Reading the Bible in graphic detail about his crucifixion. He knew how I felt. Since he had come up against much in his short life. This was done out of purpose. I needed him far before I thought possible.

I’ve went through my own “wilderness”. Being impatient rushed God’s timing in my life. I have caused decisions that made me run back to God. He opened his arms freely to receive me. No explanations, more understanding than I could muster up an excuse.

It’s funny because I had no idea these same lessons would lead me to write a book. Like most people, I wanted to “forget” some parts of my life. Some are embarrassing to recall. I had to give God my shame in exchange for dignity.

I choose to write with a mission to share my vulnerability. I wrote my book because I had a strong urge to share stories about my life. Lessons that could help the next young adult or seasoned veteran have reassurance. We are never “alone”. Someone has either enter, going or conquered what may seem like to be crushing us.

I am humbled enough to know I don’t have all the answers. Just my own trials. Ones I pray will give each person a desire in having an incredible relationship with God. Also, to think beyond yourself for just a moment: how has this “hurt” caused you to lean more on God or what advice would you want to share to a relative or stranger? Our transparency is most definitely required. Not just the outcome but the days of almost giving up. When I had to literally go back to bed and start over again. He accepts this too. Instead of complaining of the “why me”, this has changed into “how will my pain help the next person”. I pray “God use me for your glory”.